.sakura_X_petals.

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 03:32:43 GMT

my new lj

...

http://www.livejournal.com/users/sakuraxpetals/

Sat, 18 Jun 2005 21:04:29 GMT

i'm thinking of changing my livejournal name. if i do, will you follow me? ^_^

CCS!

Sat, 18 Jun 2005 20:52:09 GMT

yeahhh i got bored so i changed my layout... I'M SORRY TOMOYO! lmfao. yeah instead of the silent hill theme i've been using for like... a freaking year, i decided to change it to a cardcaptors one! i was gonna do a tsubasa one, but i couldn't find enough pictures ._. but oh well, this one is pretty lol.

when will i find my syaoran?!?!?!?!
(@_@ hides from tomoyo ^^;;;)

anyway, i can't stop thinking about this guy... i can't write his name right now lol. i don't know why... i guess i have unfinished business with him... and i really did him wrong. i was kinda talking about him with daniel last night, but like... i feel like a wuss for thinking about guys!!! goshhh. i mean like... i don't know what i want, honestly... i just feel like naru from love hina right now (AND NO DANIEL, that was not a pro-otaku reference LMFAO) but honestly, that's how i feel! i don't know what right now! i'm only 17, i don't know if i really want love... i thought i did before, but when it comes down to it, i'm too scared lol. and no i don't need anyone's direction... i know i'll follow my heart so don't give me advice on that. personally, i never follow anyone's advice... well i follow quy's advice because she's my best friend and actually KNOWS me, but i don't really follow advice too well nor do i like hearing it when i don't ask for it. but goshhh. i just want to make things right between us again!!! he NEVER did me wrong.
(and no, this was not about nick)

i love rachael yamagata... this song like brings tears to my eyes because i can totally relate to every single freaking lyric here!!!

rachael yamagata - "meet me by the water"

would you please meet me by the water, baby
we'll have a really good time
would you please meet me by the water, baby
'cause i can't get you off of my mind

i've been thinking everyday about you
don't fit anywhere into my life, but that's okay
'cause i think i might be right for you
and because of that, i'm not scared at all
and everyone says i'm crazy
and everyone says i'm a fool
would you meet me by the water tonight
'cause i'm ready to break all the rules

please don't leave me standing
with my heart in my hand
i can't last here
i'm breaking down,
and no on understands why i got here
but i knew from the very first moment
that i met you
you'd be the one

would you meet me by the water tonight
would you please fall asleep
holding my hand
'cause i've got everything in store for you, baby
if you'll be my man

uhh whatever.

Fri, 17 Jun 2005 20:12:21 GMT

i think i almost lost my virginity yesterday... but i didn't feel like a cheap slut so i didn't.

long story short, i was going to go on a date with this guy that had a girlfriend out of town. he's the same guy that stuff happened with at nationals. he was gonna take me to monterey, buy me junk, dinner, all that stuff, but since i got the woven bands on my braces, my teeth were hella hurting and junk and i knew he was going to make some kind of move on me. i was really worried about that until it gave me a headache, and i threw up... then around there, i cancelled the date. haha. but yeah, still a virgin. woot woot. i've never done anything sexual and i'm proud. virginXcore, bitches.

unlike other girls, i have pride. i am really attracted to this guy BUT i wasn't going to let it go like that. i don't care if he's only back for a little bit, then he has to go back to training... SAKURA DON'T PLAY THAT.

aint no holler back girl?

Wed, 15 Jun 2005 05:20:55 GMT

i'm gonna grow up to be a fucking power ranger.

hell yuh. YUH.

(yellow ranger. duhhh. go trini, bitches.)

Mon, 13 Jun 2005 03:42:31 GMT

since ryvveh hates me, i stole this from her...

01. Reply with your name and I will write something I like about you.
02. I will then tell what song/movie/icon reminds me of you.
03. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, I'll tell you what it would be.
04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your journal.

my broken heart just has no use.

Sat, 11 Jun 2005 18:43:11 GMT

okay i had a dream about juan last night... juan AKA the guy that kinda did stuff with me when we went away to nationals because his girlfriend was still in california. yeah. now that i think about it, he's not the only guy with a girlfriend that i've done things with... i mean, like... i've been the "other woman" a lot and i feel like a total tramp for it. i just want a serious relationship but i always get myself in this crap. why why why? yeah maybe i'm just a stupid whore.

gonna play guild wars.

carmie, tell me how to change the mood icons to anime or i'll have to rape you.

good news.

Fri, 10 Jun 2005 00:52:53 GMT

i'm a senior.
wow.

can't be that other woman.

Thu, 09 Jun 2005 03:58:39 GMT

i'm gonna go binge shopping saturday! woot.

it sucked balls. my date was a douche. i didn't have a good time... well that's a lie, i did have a great time with my friends and stuff, but honestly... nick changed a lot... for the worst. and when we got home, he was giving me this look like he wanted some.

damn it, i'm just going to be a nun. i'm in hate with him... yet i still think about him. i'm in love with the old him, not the new douchebag one.

anyway because of that, i've been trying to movie on and forget about boys... go out on dates... just have a fucking shameless good time. i don't care about feelings for now because when i do, i just get hurt. i'm proned to getting hurt so fuck it. i'm tired of dreaming about the perfect relationship that will never happen. it's balls.

okay the real reason for my entry is because mark (not my cousin) messeged me on myspace tonight. he lives near san jose and concord and we used to be dating or something everytime he came down here. the thing is... he has a girlfriend and i don't know if she knew about us. he's a good guy and the reason i really went out with him is because he was a total gentleman and (though it was selfish) i went out with him for the food. yeah i'm a fat ass. anyway he asked me if i wanted to go out tonight. since i just woke up a few minutes ago, i couldn't... but i invited him to my school's graduation tomorrow and afterward we're probably going to go on a date. i know it's kind of wrong, but i'm tired of everything right now. i know there's nothing truly serious with him and we never officially stopped dating, so what the hell? i'm not the one attached, he's the one that keeps coming back. call me a slut, maybe i am, but i just need some air and exposure to something new. we're friends but i guess dating friends, ya know?

"well, his girlfriend must be doing something wrong if he keeps coming back."

for some reason, i don't feel bad about any of this. it's not really my problem and it's not like i'm fucking him. we just go out and have a good time with no strings attached, i won't do anything i'll regret.

oh yeah. i might be medium in abercrombie and fitch... hopefully... and if i'm not, i'll fucking work out until i am.

yeahhh.

binge that shit.

Wed, 08 Jun 2005 22:44:18 GMT

prom pics are in but i want to just burn him out of all of the pictures.

i think i'm going to go binge shopping in san jose this weekend. i've been having a crappy couple of days or week or something... so if there's something you don't want me to buy, tell me now or i might buy it. fuck fuck fuck.

bow wow chika

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 06:00:48 GMT

chad and me.

fuck yeah.

one more chance to kill the pain

Sun, 05 Jun 2005 19:44:11 GMT

i'd write about prom if i knew how to do that little link that leads to the rest of the entry.

but i don't.

so until i do, i can't write about it.

i'm pissed that the track jackets are only in small because those were the only abercrombie & fitch things i wanted. i'm really pissed and i don't know what i want anymore.

yup. fuck everything.

the sun hides its head.

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 23:06:41 GMT

last night i had a really sexy conversation with my favorite lovers, carmie and jono--aka tomoyo and kero-chan! damn right, i'm sakura. hahaha.

i found the track jackets on abercrombie, and i feel like putting them on here so i can drool over them some more. these are what i'd wear.

http://www.abercrombie.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?catalogId=10901&storeId=10051&parentCategoryId=12205&childCatgroupId=12285&categoryId=12285&productId=216842&langId=-1

omg it's like hot-sex. hahaha.

i will love you forever.

forget me not

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 04:09:27 GMT

i just wish... i don't know. sometimes it's like... so complicated that i can't keep smiling forever. i think my dad sort of forgot about me because he didn't take me out for dinner for my birthday or get me a gift or anything. i really don't want to act stuck up, but it hurts a lot. sometimes i hate having divorced parents because they forget things that mean something important to you. i haven't seen my dad in a while either and he lives in the same town as me. i mean, i know he loves me and crap, but sometimes IT HURTS A LOT.

i also hate my step dad. he can burn in hell.
(he gave me $40 but fuck him anyway.)

i cooked a lot today. i cook when i'm upset. it was hella good.

well i never got to write what i got for my birthday... so here it is.
mom:
RED (fav. color!) mp3 player
sister:
rachael ray cookbook
gonna get me an anime box set
dad:
nothing... for now i guess
bitchass stepdad:
$40
grandpa:
$25

the thing that really surprised me is that quy (my best friend) got me a lot of things and i guess it makes me feel important. i guess i can still count on my friends.
quy:
hand-stitched plushie of me
hello kitty whistle
sanrio scrapbook
sango plushie
flip flops

yeah. that's all i feel like writing i guess.

shouldn't let it go.

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 23:16:13 GMT

yeahhh.

okay i guess i'm kinda in deep shit.

prom is drama.

but i'm still going.

there's a thespian drama banquet tonight.

i'm going because of my part in the winter play.

finals are NOW.

study study study.

i feel better because i got things off my chest.

holler if you love me.

yo yo yo

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 03:30:03 GMT

happy birthday to me. :|

because you kill me...

Tue, 31 May 2005 06:04:41 GMT

okay i just got back from fanime and it was a blast. i guess the zsf people went before me or something but i guess it's all good. i still managed to go.

it was awesome.

i went on monday when all the crowds were gone. it felt like an early birthday gift just going there because i LOOOOOOVE anime. i hope i get to cosplay next time because i didn't have enough preparation time to get ready for fanime. i have no freaking idea who i'm going to go as next time. maybe i'll just go as a school girl or something fun like that. who knows?

maybe by the time of a convention, i'll have a boyfriend to take... so we can cosplay together or some crap. we'll see.

ahhh i hope the next con is just as good as this one!!!

):

Sun, 29 May 2005 17:05:31 GMT

someone take me to fanime. :(

<3phanton of the opera

Fri, 27 May 2005 23:23:14 GMT

REALLY GOOD MOVIE. <3333

okay prom is a bunch of crappy drama where one girl who has a crappy date will do anything to make sure everyone else feels like crap. whether it's talking shit or making up some stupid lie, they still do it. it's fucking stupid! i'm not the one being effected since i'm a really neutral party in my crew, but just i hella defended people to a lot of assholes lately. i feel good i stood up against them and made them shut up but i know now they're just gonna keep talking crap, not about me because they PHEER ME but just... keep talking crap in general.

drama...

we sleep alone in our beds

Thu, 26 May 2005 00:50:30 GMT

yeahhh.

i order my cousage/boutinier combo! good thing i don't have to pay for it, shiiittt. lol. well not now anyway. the florists were REALLY nice and they helped me pick out the perfect coursage and junk. woot.

prom is turning everyone against each other. one chick thinks another is mad at her for saying her dress wasn't that great, another mad because someone was pushy about things. i'm glad i'm not all up in that bizzznass. haha yeah, i'm like totally neutral, i'm just relaxed. all i need done is my visitor's pass junk, then i'm cool. plus accesories O_O.

i hope nothing shitty happens.

you make me wanna...

Tue, 24 May 2005 00:19:40 GMT

preppy clothing makes me whore out O_O.

(if you say you'd buy me clothes from abercrombie&fitch, i'll be your slave)

HINT HINT BIRTHDAY lol.

uhh yeah i was kinda making fun of fobs today. some fob girl named vanessa is also called banang by her fob friends... so steffi and i made fob nicknames for each other.

steffi-babang.
me-bangus.

it's not BANG-US... it's BAH-NGoos.

hahaha. yeah.

---
Ask me 4 questions.

Any 4, no matter how personal, private or random.
I have to answer them honestly. I have to answer them all.

In turn, you post this message in your own journal and you have to answer the questions that are asked to you.
---

happy birthday?

Sat, 21 May 2005 15:28:55 GMT

my birthday is in 10 days.

what are YOU gonna get me?

__O_O__

if you get me something, i'll give you my address for your stalking pleasure.

think about it... mmm karla...

THINK ABOUT IT!
(my birthday's may 31... i'm an old fart--17)

are YOU getting me something?

she doesn't knooooow

Fri, 20 May 2005 22:46:05 GMT

okay yeah it was weird. i was walking in the halls with steffi and we saw chad walking opposite of us, and she was like, oooh karla... and so i touched his arm so he could see me (since i'm hella short) and he like waved and smiled... not in the "oh some chick's waving" but in the warm way.

it made me feel floaty.
TOMOYO makes me floaty.
yeah.

other than that, everything's the same. body hurts but i'm still alive, so i'm content.

hopefully i get my dress today. that would be awesome.

battles and battles

Fri, 20 May 2005 01:51:54 GMT

ugh okay my body hurts.

ow.

OW. ;_;

FUCKING OW.

Wed, 18 May 2005 23:21:29 GMT

i can't walk. damn you pre-prom work outs!!!

my daily workout...
1000 kime funakoshi shotokan punches
500 suburi blade slashes
500 sit ups
100 10 lb arm weights
100 back swings
rollerblading until i get hella tired

i can't rollerblade today since i can barely walk. crap.